stress

The Lights Are Out, but Nobody's Home.
Loretta LaRoche
Stress Expert and Author

One of the greatest downfalls of “non-presence” is that many of us live as if we’re on automatic pilot. In this state, our minds are shrouded in a dense fog, plowing ahead without our even knowing where we’re headed or why.

For example: Many of us obsess over our diet, yet we gobble down our food in three minute while driving our cars or talking on our cell phones.

The best way for us to get a handle on what we eat is to eat mindfully. Here’s a great exercise: Can you, for just one dinner, stay completely focused on what you’re putting in your mouth and nothing else? Try it!

Savor the moment-the flavor, the smell, the texture, the way the food feels as it travels to your stomach. In the beginning, it will be easier to do this if you’re alone and not talking to others, but that will become possible and practice.

With each bit, really get into the sensuality of it. Feel it in every way possible. Don’t think about work, the kids, or your mother-in-law. Don’t think about the amount of calories you’re ingesting. Just savor the moment. Chew each bit fully, luxuriously. Take your time and concentrate on what you’re doing.

I guarantee you that this will be the best meal you’ve had in a very long time. I also guarantee you that it will be the healthiest, regardless of what was on your plate. When you eat mindfully, your body has time to react to what you’re putting into it. You’ll eat more sensible, and you’ll most likely eat an awful lot less than you would otherwise. When you take the time to really sense what your body is telling you-and what your senses appreciate-your body regulates itself wisely.

When you eat while performing several other tasks, the chance of feeling satisfies is slim to none.

Your mind is concentrating on other things, so how could you possible by truly aware of what you’re eating and the effect it’s having on your body?

The same is true of everything you do…all day, every day. The more you stop the noise and really stay present in what you’re doing, the better you’re going to do it.

Sex is the obvious illustration. How good is sex when your head’s full of chores that have to be done? It’s pretty clear that when you’re distracted during sex, the pleasure suffers.

We’re constantly bombarded with information overload, with dozens of things that need our attention, with a life full of distractions and complications. The ability to keep our minds clear and focused in one of the most critical talents we human beings have. When you find yourself doing things out of habit (or inertia) instead of feeling truly present and engaged in the moment, take a step back and ask yourself: Why have I chosen not to be here now? Do I really believe that my next moment might be better even though it’s an illusion?

The Talmud asks the question: “If not now, when?” If we don’t live our lives now, to the fullest, when in the world will we have the chance? If we don’t pay attention to the little wonders of life right this second, when will we be able to?